I'll never get to see
What you'd be like at seventy
It's just one of the moments
Taken from me.
And I'll never get to know
How our relationship would grow
If we'd only been allowed
To see
You'll never meet my Angel
Or hold my little girl
Despite how bad I want your
Involvement in my world
We never got to celebrate
My bridal shower or wedding date
It fact, my life happened far too late
For you to have been a part
Of my certifications and books
Of my business and my art
Everywhere I look
You're missing from my life
And in the years since you passed
Nothing seemed to last
I've been amazed at how fast
Everything has changed.
I've lost family and friends
And the mourning never ends
It only has the heart to lend
A good moment or good day
But then it's back again
Like the guilt of holy sin
And sometimes I feel I'm in
Some kind of waking dream
But hoping nothings is as it seems
Just never seems to work.
There's still heartache and indifference
In the vast amount of distance
No matter how I fight and try
To remain close to those I love.
I cannot help but feel
That if the love people had for me was real
They'd reach out; They'd be near
Instead of ghosts along the horizon
I can't touch and can't confide in
Passing on from this existence
Without saying goodbye.
I'd say it doesn't hurt me
Being left alone on this journey
But those who truly know me
Can see that that's a lie.
For I'm desperate for connection
For friendship and affection.
But all I get is more rejection
From those you left behind.
And it's just so damn unfair
That the two who really cared
Are no longer there
To walk by my side.
I'm alone and grieving
With a smile so deceiving
No one will know how bad I'm feeling
Since the day that you died.
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